Fabamy's Blog

Crazy life of a CenPho comedian & socialite

My DIY beauty and household cleaning stuff November 9, 2014

I talk about coconut oil like there’s no tomorrow, and people are always asking me for my recipes. So, I’ll put them all here and they can find it themselves.

I’m 43. I take extra special care of myself, because I donated my kidney a few years ago. I kind of looked at life a little, saw my kidney recipient getting healthier, and wanted to do everything possible to not get sick. Whether diabetes, kidney issues, or even just feeling like crap, I want to prevent as much as possible. (Yes, I know there are no guarantees in life.)

Make a tub of coconut oil body butter. It can be used for a lot of things (will explain!), but look at it as your beauty base. To make it, it has to be solid. I buy it by the gallon, and just scoop out a bunch and throw it in my KitchenAid mixing bowl and throw it in the fridge for about 15 minutes to make sure it’s solid. It has a very low melting point (mid-70 degrees), so the solid part is crucial to making this correctly. After it’s hard, use the whisk attachment on your mixer, and whip it up. It takes about 5 minutes. If you see it getting liquidy, stick it back in the fridge for a few moments. I add about 20 drops of lavender essential oil. Use what you want. I like lavender for the relaxation, but also because it’s antibacterial, which is why my face never breaks out.

Once it’s mixed up, I put it in short Mason jars to give as gifts. (Short so people can scoop it out and it’s not longer than their fingers.) Or, I save up old body butter containers and use those. I leave one by my bathroom sink.

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Use the body butter! You only need a little. Spread it all over your face, in a thin layer. It will melt as soon as you apply it. If you have eye makeup on, rub it gently, and it removes eye makeup instantly. Take a warm, wet, washcloth and hold it over your face for a few seconds, so the steam can help get deeper down. Wipe gently. Rinse the washcloth, and repeat. Then, rinse with cold water. (Cold water rinse tightens your pores to help prevent breakouts.) You do NOT need to use a moisturizer. In fact, you shouldn’t, because most contain mineral oil. (BAD! It’s a petroleum product!!!) I also use this to wash my face in the morning. Wait at least 15 minutes before applying makeup, or you will look spotty. You can pat a little under your eyes at night, too.

Use the body butter in place of shaving cream. Skin stays so soft, too!

No-poo hair: (I haven’t used shampoo since December 2013.)
2 tbsp baking soda. Put in cup. Fill cup with water. Stir, then massage through wet hair. Rinse. 1 tbsp Apple cider vinegar in cup. Fill cup with water. Massage through hair. Rinse. Any vinegar smell goes away once your hair is dry.

Take a pea-sized hunk of the body butter, add an equal amount of baking soda, and rub it together between your palms until it’s mixed up, about 15 – 30 seconds. Then, just rub it onto your armpits. (I don’t know why people are so grossed out about armpits.) Sometimes I will add a couple drops of lemon essential oil. Rub it in for about a minute. Chemical-free deodorant! No, it’s not an anti-perspirant because WE ARE SUPPOSED TO SWEAT. When did people become so anti-nature? If you don’t sweat, you’re keeping toxins in your body. Hello, cancer!


Laundry detergent:
I do not trust ingredients in any cleaners. So, I make my own. Not only is it SUPER cheap, but my clothes feel softer, without fabric softener (more chemicals!) and I feel better about not dumping more shit into the environment. You need one bar of fels naptha soap (or Zote). Grate the entire bar into a blender. Add 1/2 cup WASHING soda (found by laundry detergent in the store), and 1/2 cup Borax. Blend together for about 30 seconds, then scrape down the sides, and blend another 30 seconds. I dump it into a big Mason jar, and I threw in an old measuring tablespoon. Use one tablespoon per load.

When it’s recommended to wear gloves for a cleaner, then you probably shouldn’t be using it. So, try this:
1 spray bottle
2 tbsp white vinegar
1 tsp Borax
1/4 cup liquid soap (I use Dr. Bronner’s peppermint)
10-15 drops essential oil (I like grapefruit or lemon, which go nicely with the peppermint)
Put the vinegar in your spray bottle with the Borax. Add some HOT tap water, and shake it up to dissolve the Borax. Add the liquid soap and essential oil, then fill the bottle the rest of the way with hot water. Shake gently. Use this in the bathroom, kitchen, everywhere. And it smells good!

1 grapefruit
Sea or Kosher salt
Cut grapefruit in half. Dump a couple tablespoons of the salt onto the cut side, and scrub the tub in a circular motion. Rinse with hot water. Done. (You can also use the homemade cleanser above, but I like to scrub it once a month with the grapefruit.)


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