Fabamy's Blog

Crazy life of a CenPho comedian & socialite

I survived a school bombing…in 1988 May 31, 2018

Filed under: My crazy life,Uncategorized — fabamy @ 7:35 pm
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My whole adult life, I have had problems in places with loud noises, lots of smells, etc., and I could never figure out why. Then I remembered and incident when I was in high school.

It was on my 17th birthday, in 1988, when a pipe bomb went off in a kid’s locker right across the hall from mine. A student a year older than my class had been bullied for years by the jocks.

My high school was small, in a small town, in rural Upstate NY, about 15 miles east of Buffalo. I went there from kindergarten until I graduated, and many of us knew each other that entire time. The middle and high schools were actually 3 different small towns, which had their own elementary schools.

Our school was all cliques. (I didn’t belong to any of them.) It was a good school, with an occasional fight, but that’s pretty much it. The school had a giant corn field across the street where kids would go to smoke, but that was the extent of naughty.

The jocks were exceptionally brutal, male and female. I was bullied for several years by the older girls there. I even got punched in the face once, but nobody really did anything about the bullying.

It pushed one kid over the edge. His friend got access to the master keys for our lockers. He crafted a mercury-switch pipe bomb, and put it in the sneaker of the bully.

It was just after homeroom when the bomb went off. (I am getting chills and close to tears writing this, because I never have before.) My clothing and books had blood on them. There was mass confusion, but one teacher got the victim to the nurse’s office, and we all went to first period.

We were on lockdown. At the time, we had a foreign exchange student, Natalia, from Spain. Our school had phones in every classroom, and I called hers to make sure she was ok. The school’s phone lines were all overloaded, as this was 1988.

Word got out, and the news showed up. We were locked in our classrooms for several periods, and were finally released early so the investigation could continue. At this point, nobody knew WTF had happened.

I finally realized last weekend that I have PTSD from this. THIS was that loud noise that has made a lot of events very grueling for me. Just a couple weeks ago, I had to leave one of my favorite networking events because the room got so loud, I started to panic. I can feel it, even now.

I did a quick Google search of the incident, and found a tiny newspaper clipping. This was the day after, so nobody knew quite yet what had happened.pipebomb3.jpg


KMI Structural Integration Session 5 September 9, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — fabamy @ 7:33 am
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(Note: Session 4 is for the “spiral line.” My body didn’t need that work, so we skipped to session 5. I like that the series is customize-able.)

This fifth session was one I was not looking forward to. It’s the first time I really read & researched a session before going in. It’s the “lower deep frontal line” session, which works on the inner legs for support, balance, and posture. It also involves the pelvic floor. The pelvic floor is a hammock or sling of several different muscles that run horizontally along the underside of the pelvic bone.  Melissa stays within a respectful distance of private parts while still treating as much as this muscle group as is appropriate.”

I do not like pelvic work at ALL. I went to a very new massage therapist a couple years ago, and he was trying things on me that he had no business trying. I was almost on the defensive going in today. I was anticipating and drawing a conclusion that I wouldn’t enjoy it as much as the previous sessions.

The inner leg work was a little intense at times. I was laying on the table, on my side, for my legs to be worked on separately. I have a really high pain threshold (I have a few very large tattoos), but this almost made me say “Uncle.” When Melissa got into my pelvic floor, I started to take long, deep breaths. That really helped and the pain subsided.

At the end, walking around, I could feel such a difference! My legs felt lighter. I felt more balanced overall. Even my head feels clearer.

So far, I am really enjoying the series. I am not going to read ahead for the next session, though.


KMI Structural Integration Session 3

Filed under: Uncategorized — fabamy @ 7:31 am
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I went through the third KMI Structural Integration session earlier this week, which is for the Lateral Line. This was also the third superficial session. The primary goal of KMI Structural Integration is to improve the alignment and movement of the body.

The first thing we do every session is check my alignment by looking at me from both sides, then back, then front. In this way Melissa can see what is out of line. (My shoulders are not in the same spot.)

There was a lot of work done on my back, especially my lower back. A few days later, I noticed a couple dark bruises on my back. This is normal, as blood vessels can get damaged from any massage. I noticed the difference right away! When I sat in my car to drive home, I felt taller, my back felt more open, and everything just moved more freely.

I should also note that these massages are mostly “dry.” Lotions make the skin slippery, which makes it difficult to get to the bottom layer.

After this third session, my body felt opened up. It felt like all my joints and muscles were lubed-up and ready to go. The creaks are gone, too!


KMI Structural Integration – Session 1 August 19, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — fabamy @ 3:22 pm

I’ve been getting massages from The Neuromuscular Studio for over four years. I have a lot of body pain from working at my desk and on a computer, and I have very large breasts. I also hike a lot, and even though I do yoga, I will still feel tight.

Yesterday, I started a series of sessions in KMI Structural Integration. In the first four sessions, the superficial tissueis worked on. It’s been described as “making peace with gravity.”

My first session started with having my height measured. I stood against the wall, like I was 5, and Melissa (Voight) took the measurement, and put a sticky on her wall. It’s expected to be taller once the series is over, because everything has been worked into alignment.

2015-08-18 12.02.07 2015-08-18 12.03.28

I wore my bra and panties (this is what I was asked to do. I don’t wear clothes during a typical massage.) and stood in different positions so Melissa could check my posture. It was crazy to see my left shoulder about an inch higher than my right!

We started with some breathing exercises (which I am doing now, since I just reminded myself!) that had me breathing into wherever I was feeling pain. Yesterday, it was my middle back. I could feel my ribs expanding and breath cleaning out some of the pain. Sometimes, we just need more oxygen!

A KMI massage is mostly “dry.” There isn’t any lotion used to create a grip on the skin. What’s being worked on is the layer between the skin and your muscle. If you’ve ever seen a tenderloin, there’s that thin membrane covering parts of it you have to slice off with a very thin blade before cooking. We have that, too.

I had to do some small movements, too, during her practice, to help everything get worked into its place. This wasn’t a lie-there-and-listen-to-the-waterfalls massage. I was active the entire time.

At the end of each targeted area, Melissa would have me get up and walk around. The lightness of my body was instant! When I walked after one leg was done, I could feel a difference between them. One leg just didn’t move as freely and didn’t feel as light.

When the session ended and I stood up, I felt lighter, and well-oiled. Everything just moved more smoothly. I’m really excited for next week.

This is a 12-week session. That’s a big commitment, but I am committed to getting rid of the pain I am in 24/7. And, maybe I’ll be 5’8″ when we’re done. (I’m only five feet tall. Haha!)


Ain’t That A Shame! July 23, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — fabamy @ 1:46 pm

Foodwinejunkie's Blog

I normally write about food, but today I’m going to write about something that, for many, is very closely linked to food: body image. Any regular readers of my blog will know I, like many women (and men), spent countless years of my life in a food fight. That is, I loved to eat, but I also was obsessed with fitting in with whatever body type was being exulted by the media at any given moment. So, I wasted so much time on crash diets, hating my body and basically, missing out on many of life’s wonderful moments. I mean, how do you truly enjoy a bubbling hot piece of pizza if all you are thinking about is what it MAY do to your thighs? You can’t. Luckily, with a lot of soul-searching I finally made peace with food and for the most part, my body.

Now, just because I…

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Watch: David Letterman’s Final ‘Late Show’ Entrance May 21, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — fabamy @ 7:22 am

I can’t even watch it. I’m so sad about it!


I toured a medical marijuana growhouse tonight! February 11, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — fabamy @ 8:07 pm
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A few weeks ago, I got a notification on Facebook from a friend, inviting me to take a tour of a growhouse. I sent my RSVP, and waited for further instructions. They didn’t give out the name or address publicly. You had to be one of the first 50 to respond to get on the list and get the instructions. That’s super cool, in my book. I told my friend Jenny about it, and she got in, too. I also noticed a couple other friends who had replied that they were going.

Now, I don’t know about zoning or anything, so I don’t know how many of these are in the area where we went, in South Phoenix. I don’t know the size of the facility. It was just any old industrial warehouse with a fence around it.

We were not allowed to have our cell phones out at all during the tour. We were not allowed to take pictures, either.

We walked in and could smell the cannabis immediately. There were chairs set up for us, and we listened to a couple speakers before being taken on a short tour. The first room was smaller plants. (The smallest are in a “nursery” and are just too small to bother showing, and the room is tiny.) Each plant (in this facility, these strains), takes about two months to mature. For a certain amount of time, they are in one room, then they get moved to the next, and the next.

The lights started out as bluish, and we were informed that spectrum of light represents Spring and Summer, when plants are starting to grow in nature. As the tour progressed from room to room, the lights got less blue and more yellow-orange. The last room, with plants about 2 weeks from maturity, had lights that were the most orange out of all of them, such as in Autumn.

When I looked around at the crowd, about 25% of the people were older than 60. Two were in wheelchairs. Everyone else just looked like any normal people, and there were about as many women as men.

The best part about the entire night was this: education. There were people asking questions who knew nothing about the industry, or the benefits of medical marijuana. But, they wanted to learn and get involved.

Isn’t it best to have an informed opinion?

This is NOT the facility where we were. We were not allowed to have cell phones at all.

This is NOT the facility where we were. We were not allowed to have cell phones at all.


I’m a nerd. I play Ingress. January 11, 2015

Filed under: Uncategorized — fabamy @ 6:25 pm
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Last summer, I saw on a friend’s Facebook that they liked “Ingress.” I had no idea what it was, so I did a Google search and found a new addiction.

Basically, Ingress is a worldwide, GPS-based game that sends you to “portals” everywhere. For example, a mural on a building could be a portal. There are two teams: Enlightened and Resistance. Both have their own personalities. You can look those up. I’m on the Enlightened team because I like green more than blue. That’s seriously how I chose sides.

What I love about Ingress is that you have to physically go to each portal. Like, walk. Some people drive, some people bike, but I love walking. I have logged over 300 kilometers since I started playing in August. I can get up close to whatever the portal is and see something in my neighborhood I may have otherwise overlooked. That’s the second thing I love about this game.

Third, it’s a new social circle for me. I love meeting new people and making connections. I knew NOBODY at the first happy hour event I went to. I was 100% anonymous, and I loved it. I didn’t know a whole lot about the game, and it was good to learn from people who had been playing for a long time and were at a high level.

So, I learn new things. I meet new people. I walk a lot. Try it out. It’s pretty cool!


Why learning Spanish, not Mandarin, is the best way to globalize your ideas December 18, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — fabamy @ 10:16 am

Cool thoughts on this! I’m fluent in Spanish. 🙂


Life is awesome…and then it punches you in the face. October 30, 2014

The past few years have been pretty difficult for me, financially. I was fired from one job for donating my kidney. I got laid off from another, but that was awesome because I started my own business. Still, the financial side I was always playing “catch-up” in, and I just couldn’t make it so that I had play money. I almost had to move in with my parents last year. Business was slow, I was making the documentary, and I put every penny of my savings into the film. But, at the last second of 2013, I got a pretty well-paying client, and I slowly got myself back on my feet.

It worked out really well! I was catching up on bills, I could go to dinner more than once a month with my friends, and I even had some money to buy some clothes. Nothing fancy, but it was still fun. My business exploded this summer! I ended up hiring Jada to work part-time for me, and she’s doing a great job. It was to the point that I was about to do something I hadn’t done in 14 years: go on a real vacation.

14 years. That’s a LONG time to work your ass off, but never get to take a vacation. Sure, there were years I made a shitload of money, but I was addicted to it. I wasn’t taking days off, so I could make more and more money. But, I crashed and burned. I was working way more than full-time, doing stand-up a few nights a week, doing my radio show, and managing a band or two. What a life! Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuntil you crash and burn, like I did.

Anyway, my dog got something in his eye a month ago, and there were three vet visits in that time. I had almost a thousand dollars saved up…and it’s gone. I’d been looking at different websites for plane tickets for a couple weeks, because I was ALMOST THERE! I was going on vacation!!!


But, the universe decided to make me take a step back. All I saved is gone, because Dexter needed it. I’m ok with it, because now he is on the mend and not in pain anymore. He’s doing great! And I’m thankful I had the means to take care of him.

Still, that trip to Costa Rica, to sit on the beach for a week with no computer, no hair dryer, no makeup, no distractions, is going to have to wait a couple more months. Whatever. My birthday’s in February, so it’ll fucking happen. I’ll MAKE IT HAPPEN.


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